27

For as long as I can remember, I've always wanted to be 27 years old. In foresight, it seemed like an age where I'd have life figured out, a nice little career, be married (and possibly a kid or two), and love my life. I never liked being in my early twenties. I felt there was always a stigma of overall immaturity attached to being young and in college. People always were telling me to "go out and have fun," and I did- but still, I wanted to be a stable 27 year old with everything in place.

11 days to go!

Today, I am 27. And while I can't say that life is completely figured out and have everything into place, I feel like I have everything I need, nothing more and nothing less. I feel like I'm in a great place in my life, with much to be thankful for. This isn't the picture I envisioned for myself at 27; in fact, it's so much better than I ever thought possible! Sometimes I feel so unworthy of God's blessings in my life.

Today was such a perfect day. The weather here in Wichita reached 70 degrees- can you believe that? Pretty rare for one of the last days of the year.
We have really missed all this crazy weather that the rest of the states seem to be having the past few weeks. I spent the gorgeous day with my two favorite boys who took me to lunch at my favorite spot, and then to the Zoo (which seemed to be the hot spot for everyone in the city- it was packed!). I am also the proud new owner of one of these:
A KA Artisan stand mixer! I was shocked! I had mentioned to Jon a few times that I was considering purchasing a KA mixer on Black Friday if there was a good deal out there. I didn't find one, but was so surprised to unwrap one this morning!

Hope everyone has a great New Years!

My calling in life is not a cake decorator.

If I ever would have the desire to give up my job as a graphic designer and become a cake designer instead, I can now put that idea to rest. Today is our 3rd wedding anniversary and I thought I'd make a cake to celebrate (I also happen to be craving cake-how convenient, right?). I think I make cupcakes that are out of this world, so a cake wouldn't be too much different, or so I thought. WRONG. My cake looks like a 6th grade home-ec project that was nibbled on by hungry mice. I like making things that are pretty, so this is a little bit of a disappointment. I know it will taste great, but somehow I imagined it looking more like the cake we had on our wedding day- perfect fondant, with pearls and swirls. Um... yeah, not so much. Go ahead and laugh if you feel compelled.

And for the record: white cake on top, dark chocolate on bottom with a cream cheese frosting and sprinkles.
I also thought I would share a few pictures of us through the years. We've changed a lot in over 6 years!
This was one of our first pictures we ever took. Tidbit: Jon used to wear crazy matching jump-suit outfits and I'm happy to report that he doesn't anymore =)!

We used to have family in Florida, so we took advantage and went to Disney several times!

One of my sorority formals I dragged him to.

This was at the Melting Pot shortly after we were married, I believe. Now we just make our own fondue at home!

And then we welcomed a baby boy into our family! This was taken on Christmas when Cameron was just 3 weeks old! =)


And our most recent family picture, taken on Easter. We've come a long way, and have a long ways to go! I can't wait to see what the next year brings!

"Sooner than later"

A few weeks ago I opened up to answer any questions that readers of this blog might have about me. One of the questions asked: "Any thoughts on baby #2?" It's actually a question we get pretty frequently (I'm sure most married couples can relate!) and I never mind answering. Anyway, my answer was "yes- and sooner than later." That was my plan. It's always been my plan to have children that are fairly close in age- I've never minded the idea of having 2 kids in diapers, 2 kids in braces, 2 kids in college.
The problem is, what if that's not God's plan? A few days after I typed "sooner than later" we found out I was pregnant. I was excited! Our kids would be exactly 2 years apart. Perfect! Only problem was it didn't seem to line up with God's plan for our family- and I miscarried a few days later. I'm totally at peace with our loss- and more than anything it really goes to show that you can't map out your plan in life without praying for God's direction. All to often I paint a pretty picture in my mind of how our life should look (anyone else do that?) but I forget that God has the upper hand here. So this week, I've been counting my blessings- I have SO many- and I know that in God's time we'll be blessed again. In the meantime, check out one of the greatest blessings I've ever received!He LOVES wagon rides!

He helps me out with the laundry by pulling everything out and then climbing in! =)

My future artist! I love his little scribbles (so long as they aren't on the furniture).
The weather has really been beautiful lately- I'm really hoping to get out and get some new photos of him soon!

Blog-cation.

That's what I've been up to lately. A vacation from my blog. I'm in the middle of tons of projects, with no real pictures to show or updates to tell you about. So, in lieu of writing another post of boring snippets, I'd like to take this opportunity to see if any of you have any questions for me or about me? That's right- this is your chance to ask me anything- anything at all (that isn't too personal or yield an answer that might make my mom's jaw drop). So go ahead, ask away! I'll be back with answers to the questions soon.
Also, I'll have a little giveaway by the end of the week-so definitely stay tuned!

A Cameron overload and a few thoughts on toddlerhood.

It's been a long time since I've posted anything about Cameron- and since I don't do the monthly updates anymore, I figure it's time to post some pictures! I also wanted to jot down a few of my thoughts about his little life after his first birthday. I know there are several of my blog friends who are new moms, and moms to be, so maybe you'll benefit from my note-taking. =)


A little about Cameron at 14 months:
It was so much easier to feed Cameron a few months ago. Purees were such a breeze. I took pride in the fact that he would eat anything and everything, including veggies- which now he will only eat if the veggie is disguised in cheese. Yes, his favorite foods these days are grilled cheese, mac n' cheese, cheese pizza, shredded cheese, broccoli and cheese... you get the trend. Definitely not lacking Calcium!He loves to read!

Cameron sleeps from 8pm- 7:30/8am, with about a 2.5-3 hour nap in the afternoons.


I don't know if I have mentioned it, but Cameron is quite a ladies man. At Panera the other day, he was flirting and laughing with some pretty girls at the table next to us the whole entire time we were there. I'm pretty sure they didn't even get a conversation in between themselves, because Cameron made sure he was he center of their attention. He also flirts with every waitress we have- including one the other day, whose skirt was a little too short- so he made sure to let her know that by glancing up it every time she returned to our table.

9 times out of 10, if Cameron is missing in action, he can be found playing in the toilet.

Cameron loves to walk around with a pen and pad of paper in hand, scribbling and drawing "pictures" (ha!). I hope he loves to color when he gets a bit older, because I still enjoy it and would love to color in books with him!
When Cameron was born, he looked a lot like me. His dark brown eyes and brown skin tone definitely proved he was my son! But as he gets older, one of the first things people say is how much he looks like his dad. Fine by me, I think his dad is the most handsome man I know!

Developmentally, he seems to be right on track. He "talks" up a storm, can answer a question with a "ya" or "no", can make a lot of animal sounds (thanks to our fridge farm!), can throw and kick a ball, and can climb pretty much anything- including our bar-height dining chairs! He's wearing mostly 18month-2T shirts, and 18 month pants.
A little about my thoughts on the toddler stage:
Each month I always say "this is the funnest age!" But really, this is such a fun age. I love that he understands most of what we say. He is full of energy and life, and is a constant source of entertainment. I feel like he is fairly obedient right now- we have been firm at establishing some boundaries, but I also feel like he's able to be a toddler too. I wish I could say that it would always be this easy!

There was a discussion on The Nest forums the other day about the changes you go through when you have a new baby; how hard things can be and how emotionally and physically exhausting it all is to adjust to your new life. My comment was a nod in agreement, but I also mentioned that it never really gets any easier per se- it just gets different. You get into a routine, so in that respect, things flow smoother, and you seem to get your life back when you can catch an amazing 6-7 hours of solid sleeping. Things got easier for awhile- but here recently I feel like I spend a majority of the day sweeping up food chunks and crushed crackers off the floor, picking up toys (again and again) wiping his nose (and wiping my jeans off because he wiped his nose on my them), putting tupperware back into the drawer, chasing after him... it's downright exhausting. And he's a great kid- we're not even into the terrible two's yet.
Despite that it's a tough job being a parent to a toddler parent in general, I cannot even put into words the joy and blessing he brings to us on a daily basis. Our lives have been enriched tenfold. It's difficult to hear about the things you will sacrifice when you do become a parent. 'Cause lets be honest- giving up your blissful sleep and all your free time for the next, oh, 18 years hardly sounds appealing- that is until you see firsthand all the joys that far outweigh it. There's nothing I wouldn't sacrifice to be my son's mom. Nothing.
I just love him, and think he is the cutest kid (obviously, like most parents think of their own children)!

I'm becoming one of "those" moms.

Y'know... those moms.
The type of mom who I used to give a huge eye roll to when they would do something that I swore I would never do when I became a mom. You know the type. And if you don't have kids, you're probably guilty of mumbling a form of the following statement: "I'll never do that when I become a mom!"
The backstory:
The year was 2005. I wasn't married yet and I didn't have any children. I did, however, work in a nice department store selling men's and kids shoes. It was a great job- I made good money and I often fed my hard earned dollar right back to the store where I worked. Anyway, one of the biggest pet peeves I had from working there came from "those" moms who shopped with their kids there. Most would buy their kids a pair of shoes, and I wouldn't see them again for a few months. And that's how I liked it, thank you. But there were a select few (what I call "those" moms) who would shop the clearance table for cheap off-season shoes that their kids could wear the following year. And our conversation would go something like this:
That mom: "Excuse me, Miss?? What size will my child wear next winter?"
Me: "Um, yeah... I couldn't really tell you that for sure."
That mom: "Well, he's 3 feet 5 inches, 8 years old, and will be in 3rd grade in the fall!"
Me "Oh, well then! Let me pull out my handy magic calculator and plug that info right in!"

In case you're wondering, I usually left out that last part. But you can imagine why I told myself I would NOT be one of those moms who would buy their kids shoes several seasons in advance to save a few dollars. Those moms were annoying and hardly contributed to the commission on my check. (Yikes! That's harsh.)
I ate my words today. You see, Target is having a stellar sale on kids clothes right now. Actually, Target is having a stellar sale on just about everything right now. I bought Cameron a pair of snowboots for $3.75 (regularly $14.99!) yesterday. I got home and realized that it would be really nice if I could get him a pair for next year, too. A quick google search tells me the approximate size for 2 year olds, and I rush back to the store for another pair.
And just like that, I'm one of those moms I said I'd never be. I fear it's only the beginning.
So what about you? Are you one of "those" moms? Or are you the type that says "I'll never be one of those moms!" (who will most likely eat their words)?

Oh, and...

Jon and I joined a softball team with a few of his brothers and our first game is tonight! Thoughts that are running through my head:

• I'm about to find out how old I'm getting. I played sports all throughout highschool (never softball, though) but it's been awhile since I've worked up a sweat.
  
• I have to shave my legs. It's been awhile since I've done it and I hate doing it. I should have thought about this before I signed up.
  
• I'm the only girl on my team. In fact, I am probably one of a handful of girls in the whole league. I hope the boys take it easy on me!
  
• I forsee the following comment sometime during the season: "Jon, your wife is better at softball than you." Neither of us have played, but I've always smashed my husband in the batting cages. Hee! Regardless, I think it will be a fun time for us and maybe we'll meet some new friends!
  

Thinking out loud.

Lately I've been think a lot about the next step (career wise) in my life is. I went to college, earned a degree in graphic design and advertising, and had every intention to have a pretty cool job using the skills I obtained in 4 years of school. I like to write. I like to take photographs. I like to illustrate, although I am very hard on myself and critical of my own work. 

For the last several years I've been working at an architect firm doing everything from ad design for publications, promotional material design, copywriting, basically everything except dealing with the actual architecture itself. Before I went on maternity leave, things had really slowed down as we were hardly immune to the cruddy economy. Several were laid off, and the rest (including myself) were put on a reduced work schedule. Since having Cameron, I'm only working on an as-needed basis, doing an new ad every 6 weeks or so. I am grateful for the job, and have built a nice professional portfolio there, but it no longer fuels my creative desire. 

Not a day passes that I don't think about what I'm supposed to be doing. I LOVE being a mom, but I'm the type of person who thinks I should be part of a dual income. I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I feel like being "just" a mom isn't enough. My husband works so hard, I feel like I'm not doing my part, you know? I know that being a stay at home mom is hard work- some of the hardest work I've ever done, and I'm absolutely exhausted by about 4 pm every single day. But I still feel like there is something else I should be doing. What that "something else" is, I'm not sure.

This is where I struggle- trying to figure out what I should be doing. I know that I don't want to work 50 hours a week at a grueling workplace. I've thought about illustrating and writing children's books. I've thought about freelance designing (I have done this from time to time). As much as I like photography, I don't see it developing into anything other than a wonderful hobby. I've thought about setting up a online shop where I could do custom invites, stationary, and other designed goodies. And these are just a few ideas I've been tossing around. =) 

I rarely never blog about things that really eat me, so if you made it to the end of this long winded post, thank you! I'm not even sure I should post it. I hope that by writing it all out I can better organize my thought process? At least that's what I'm telling myself. =) And if anyone has struggled with what their supposed to be doing, life's purpose, provide me some insight! 

I gotta be honest...

I've been tagged by the lovely Abby to list 10 honest facts about me!

Here are the rules:

01. Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.

02. Show the 7 winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with "Honest Scrap." Well, there's no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon.

03. List at least 10 honest things about yourself

1. I like to drink juice straight out of its carton or container. I open up the fridge, twist off the cap, and take a few glugs. This way, there's no dirtying up of a glass, and I tend to think that juice tastes best when consumed this way. 
   
2. Speaking of juice, I may have a slight addiction to apple juice. If I were to place blame for my addiction to said juice, I'd be pointing my fingers at the hospital where I delivered Cameron. For five days straight, one of the only liquids I had during my stay was apple juice. Prior to my stay, I hadn't had apple juice (that wasn't in a martini) for as long as I can remember. I suppose it's not the worst addiction one could have after a major surgery?
3. Age doesn't seem to be a factor in the "grass is always greener on the other side" mentality. My 8 year old niece, Lizzie, told me last Sunday that she couldn't wait to be an adult so that she didn't have to do school work anymore. Silly girl, she is. What I wouldn't do to trade her places so I could do simple addition and ace spelling tests every Friday. 
4. That reminds me, I was the fifth grade Spelling Bee Champion in grade school. I even have a trophy, complete with a plastic gold bee at the top. Its probably collecting dust somewhere in my parents storage room. 
5. I do not kid when I say I have sleep deprivation. I'd pay upwards of 500 dollars for just 5 hours of continuous snoozing. 
6. I foresee a great benefit of having a kid: kid birthday parties. I'm looking forward to getting to go to kids birthday parties at Chuck E. Cheese, and then ransack the loot bags my kids bring home for candy and worthless (but cool, nonetheless) party favors. 
7. Thanks to my iphone, I can now blog while in the bathtub. When Jon arrives home for the evening, I get to take a hot bubbly soak in the tub where I catch up on reading every one's blog. Gone are the days when I used to drag my laptop into the bathroom and worry about immersing the darned thing. 
8. A few things have saddened me in the last few days: I went through some of Cameron's clothes and realized half of it doesn't fit anymore. My long little boy is wearing mostly 3-6 month clothing. And we put him in his crib for the first time last night; suddenly my big boy seemed so tiny in that crib. It makes me a little sad; I blink, and he grows. 
9. I have an overwhelming urge to pee right now (just being honest), but my boy is asleep and I don't dare put him down- this is the best nap he's had all day.
10. I think about Las Vegas on a daily basis. We are going this summer for Jon's 30th birthday and I just can't wait. It's been a few years since we've been and I'm DYING to get there and cut loose a little. 

I think many people I know have been tagged at this point. But if you are (still) reading this and haven't done it, by all means do! I'll be checking your blog in my bath tonight and I need reading material. 

P.S- For those who visit my blog strictly to see pictures of my adorable son, sit tight. I'll get some up in a few days. =)

I have been tagged!

So I was tagged about 8 days ago by extwife to list 6 random facts about myself.

1. I'm really into Junior Mints right now. I could eat a movie-theatre sized box in one sitting! (Hey, at least my breath will smell fresh.)

2. I'm quite anal about my food not touching each other on a plate. It's one thing when I like everything that's on the plate, but when I order a grilled cheese sandwich and the bread is soggied up by the nasty pickle that has been thrown on the side, you bet I'll tear off the part that's been contaminated. If it's really bad, I'll send it back.

3. Speaking of soggy food, I absolutely love soggy cereal. Soggy Wheaties, soggy Cheerios, soggy Froot Loops-- it's all good to me. I often pour the milk and then let it marinate into the cereal for a few minutes for prime soggy potential.

4. I've had several ads I designed be published in magazines on multiple occasions this year. I would show you an ad I designed, but then you'd know where I work, and then I'd have to kill you. So, for the pure sake of having an image in this post, here's an ad campaign I did for Mont Blanc pens for a class in college.

The ad design and copy had to convey the status and lifestyle of people who use or would want to buy a Mont Blanc pen.

5. I really hate my eyebrows. They are long and stick out very badly. When i wake up from a nap they are sticking out in every direction imaginable, so I have to hairspray or gel them on a daily basis.

6. I'm not sure I'm ready to give birth to my husband's son. He talks daily about what a "ninja" his son will be, and how they are going to team up against me. I'm just not quite sure I'm ready to have 2 honery boys around the house. If you think of me, pray for my sanity. I only have 15 weeks left! Yikes! And a reminder for the rest of you, that means 15 weeks until all that Holiday Shopping madness begins.

I'm only going to tag one person instead of 6 (I think everyone else has been tagged), and that's my dear little sis, Jen.

Fun with letters!

I have been tagged by fioretta! If you've never checked out her blog/etsy store- it full of wonderful little handmade designs!

A: Attached or Single? Happily married!

B: Best Friend? My husband.

C: Cake or Pie? I've never been known to pass up a slice of cake. Or 3.

D: Day of Choice? Sunday mornings. Listening to praise music before church sets the day off right!

E: Essential Item? C.O Bigelow mint lip balm.

F: Favorite Color? I love to wear black- but I'm loving green more and more.

G: Gummy bears or worms? These are the same thing, yes? I wouldn't pass up either.

H: Hometown? Somewhere over the rainbow. Near a yellow brick road.

I: Indulgence? Sheesh. This list has multipled since I got knocked up. It includes (but is not limited too) anything from Sonic, cake, ice cream, froot loops, cheetos... you know, the healthy stuff.

J: January or July? Probably July. by that month, the temps aren't scorching just yet here.

K: Kids? One will be arriving around the holidays!

L: Life isn't complete without? My God, my husband, and our families. And Cheetos.

M: Marriage date? June 2, 2007

N: Number of brothers and sisters? one sis.

O: Oranges or apples? depends on my mood. I like 'em both. Our bearded dragons however are quite picky and only like Golden delicious apples.

P: Phobias and fears? Carwashes. And crickets. They're black, shiny, and chirp. Not a fan of either of them.

Q: Quote? "People only do what they know how to do."

R: Reason to smile? I have every reason to smile!

S: Season of choice? Spring and Fall. I love the colorful seasons.

T: Tag three people? OK... how about Dr. Erin, Kari, and

U: Unknown fact about me? I hold my high school track record for the long jump (17'2, I think) and the javelin (125 feet).

V: Vegetable? Corn and green beans. I despise most others, including lettuce.

W: Worst habit? Spending money. Although, I have become much better recently!

X: X-ray or Ultrasound? Ultrasound? I'll be having one soon!

Y: Your favorite food? Pizza, hands down.

Z: Zodiac sign? Capricorn

I have been TAGGED!

Kari tagged me!

Here are the rules:

Link to the person who tagged you.
Post the rules on your blog.
Share seven random and/or weird facts about yourself on your blog.
Tag seven random people at the end of your post, and include links to their blogs.
Leave a comment on their blogs so that they know they have been tagged.

Random Facts:
1. I HATE french fries/mashed potatoes/baked potatoes-- any form of potatoes. I usually don't throw the word "hate" around lightly (except when to referring to car washes- I HATE those) but in this case, it's vital.

2. I have an alligator named "chomp". Yep, he's the type that can get up to 25 feet in the wild. No worries though, Chomp is fairly small, and wouldn't hurt a fly.

3. I want to be a back-up singer for Justin Timberlake. Can I sing? Nope. But could I sway from side to side while swinging my arms and snapping my fingers? You bet. Something about doing that while synchronized with other back-ups facinates the heck outta me...

4. I'm from Kansas, and I can surf.

5. Me and my husband are the silliest people. We find humor in everyday life. We have a thing where we like to take tons of silly pictures when we are bored (usually at the in-laws) and we laugh and laugh until we run out of poses.

6. I'm obsessed with Pizza Hut. I probably eat it twice a week. Sometimes more.

7. A few nicknames I have received over the years: Lester, Lester the molester, swirly (from being bi-racial) and UPS (what can Brown do for you?).

And to tag a few peeps... CeeCee, Mush. And I'm out!

Car washes. I REALLY don't like them.

Did that little groundhog (Phil, right?) see his shadow this year? I'm ready for this winter to end. The snow and ice is all fun and games until Christmas-- and then it's not funny to me anymore.

The winter can wreak havoc on a lot of things; not only does it make my skin pasty and my hair electric, it leaves my car filthy from all the sand and de-ice mix. And since getting out and handwashing my car during the winter months is out of the question, I found myself at the neighborhood car wash today. (You might be wondering why this deserves a blog entry, but keep reading). People have fears. Normal people fear spiders, heights, flying, etc., but I am not normal. I fear car washes. As I am pulling up to pay for the price of a clean car, I can barely stick my credit card into the slot because my hands are horribly shaking. The gate opens, and as I pull foward; I realize there's no turning back. I literally freak out as I'm going through one of these things. It's not that I'm clausterphobic. It's the fact that I'm stuck in my car for 90 seconds with huge brushes that look like octopi slapping their ugly little tentacles on my car. And those tentacles are powerful enough to actually shake and make my car rumble. Did I mention there's zero visibility while you're in these car washes? The light at the end of the tunnel can't come quickly enough, and as the car wash spits you out, you realize that you are centimeters from someone elses bumper (who proceeds to sit in neutral while you're blantanly honking for them to move). It's all very traumatic, really. Have you been through one? They're scary, right?